Friday, March 19, 2010

I'm back..........

I've decided I'm going to start posting here again cuz I need it for therapy and cuz I don't want to overwhelm anybody on my other blog with my craziness!

To be totally honest with myself, I've been off track since our home remodel, way back on February 18th or 19th. That's a month that I've been off track. Not seriously, totally, wildly off track, but a day here, or a couple days there. It's keeping me from losing and it's scaring me. The rationalizations I'm giving myself are tenfold and silly, such as........You're a homesteader, homestead women are plump and sturdy........or........you're a stay at home mom and should be nice and fluffy like Mrs. Clause.........RIDICULOUS!!!! The things that my demon trys to convince me of.

Anyway, I'm going back to ridin' the horse that got me here. I'm going back to blogging about my feelings and my weight loss, even if I've really got nothing to say. That's why I quit blogging about it, I was cocky and over confident and felt like I had nothing to report. Well God has slapped me down and let me know that I'm soooo not in control, not at all!! I'm also going back to running and taking time off from lifting weights. Now I know that I blogged all the time about how much I loved lifting weights, and I did and do love it. However, it dramatically slowed my weight loss and that part I didn't like so much, so I think I got discouraged and started letting my old behaviors creep back in. Not good when you've got the food issues that I've got. I'm also recommitting myself to the crunch challenge. I was feeling lean and strong when I was doing 200 crunches a day, and my back didn't hurt at all! I haven't consistently done them in a month and my back is telling me about it. I'm also going to do one more thing that sort of makes me feel like a quitter, but I feel like it's something I need to do. I'm changing my goal weight to 160 lbs. Once I get to 160 then I'm going to concentrate on keeping myself under 161 lbs, without putting myself on maintenance. If I can lose more then that's good but my goal will just be to not gain!!!

So that's where I'm at! I'm ok, still feel good, still love myself, haven't spiraled into the pit of depression or despair. I'm just recommitting myself to making every bite count nutritionally, and if it ain't bringing something to the table in regards to my health, I'm not going to eat it. I had really slacked on that part of things and that makes me mad at myself.

To sum up........I'm worth it, I love myself, I'm strong, determined, and fabulous. I'm a warrior and I'm strapping on my armor once again, can you hear me roaring??

Till next time..............I'm back to unTHICKINandsoreadytobeTHINNIN!

God bless!

4 comments:

  1. Oh girl, I so hear you. Since February, I have been such a slacker with me eating. I get so mad at myself. I know exactly what I need to do and choose to make bad decisions. UGH! I'm so glad I'm not the only one struggling. That's why I haven't dealt with the scale the last week or two cause I knew I would just be upset. I recommitted myself this week to healthier eating. We're gonna make it!

    ReplyDelete
  2. You said it! It's hard, but we're worth it!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Been there, done that, been out of it--felt great, back to been there.... It is an ongoing struggle or challenge.. Get back on track - you know what to do now just like me you need to convince yourself.... We can do it!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Thanks for the support! We'll all get there!

    ReplyDelete

If you'd like to comment, I love to hear from folks and I will do my absolute very best to comment back or answer any questions!