Day three!

Well it is day 3 of my weight loss journey.........if I live to be 82 years old that only leaves me 18,250 days to go! WHOO HOO! Just kidding, I hope to live to a nice ripe old age where I'm all wrinkled and Daddy P really wants to put me in a home, but he's just as old and wrinkled up as I am so we keep each other around because really after 60+ years of marriage it would just be rude to ship one of us off to the home without the other! Whew!

Well it's going really well! I've done my elliptical machine every day (three whole days in a ROW, I know I know it's amazing, save your applause for the end of the post, please) and I'm also doing some stretches that I found on the WW website. They are good for me cause of when I separated my ribs, my back still tweaks once in awhile and I'm hopeful that these stretches will help it out. I'm also going to incorporate some weight lifting into my exercise program cause I really really like lifting weights. I plan to do the elliptical on M, W, F, along with the weight lifting, then do the elliptical and stretches on T, TH, and see how that works out for me.

I'm still in the euphoric first days of my relationship with this new program, where I'm just certain that in a matter of a week I'll be buff like Jennifer Aniston and the photos will show it! LMAO! Oh how we lie to ourselves when we are Miss Pollyanna Happypants like I am. My big crash will come on Tuesday morning when I get on the scale and take my update photo! But that is the way it is. This is going to have to be a lifelong change, and I've got to suck it up (but not mashed potatoes, don't suck those up) and accept that I will have to be careful and work hard for the REST OF MY LIFE, but it is worth it to be as healthy as I can be. Now I know that I could get hit by a bus tomorrow (although not here cause I live in a very rural area and there's no such thing as public transpo and school is out for the summer) or my horse Champ could kick me in the head as I'm crouched underneath his belly putting his fly boots on (why stay on one side and have to get up and switch when you can just get square underneath and do all four at once??) and I could die. But I figure I should try to make myself as healthy as I can while I'm here. The most important thing for me to do is make myself right with God every day, and I do so strive for that! I fall, as we all do, but He lifts us up if only we will let Him in! I was reading my Bible after making this post and came up with these verses from Ephesians chapter 3 verses 17-19 That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye being rooted and grounded in love may be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height; and to know the love of Christ which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fullness of God.

That verse spoke to me once again in describing the fullness of Christ's love. I love my Jesus so much but (I'm very ashamed to admit this) I tend to put FOOD first in my life. How sickening is that? I want to delete it, I don't even want it written down, but sometimes it's true. It's that demon that I talked about in my first post.....it is that that I must defeat! So I gird my sturdy (but soon to be svelte) loins with the power of Christ's Love and am determined to beat this once and for all!

Until next time! I'll be so unTHICKIN and totally THINNIN!

Big Ole Patty Pan!

This is a 1#11oz patty pan squash that I picked from my garden this evening. Isn't it purty!

The rest of my garden isn't doing so great! lol

It's been such a wet year and my tomatoes got mudded in, as well as my peppers. Zucchini is doing well, as well as the squash and cucumbers. Basically my tomatoes and peppers are quite the disappointment, but such if gardening.......you have good years and not so good years!

Hope yours is a good one!

Til next time............GOD BLESS FROM GOODWIFE FARM!

I think.......

I think what I wish more than anything else (in regards to my food issues) is to be like a normal healthy weight person. I wish that I didn't have to obsess over food.......am I really hungry? am I eating too much? am I eating enough (not that that one is ever too much of a concern)? is this what I should be eating? UGH!!!!!! I just wish that I was one of those people who could get hungry, eat something, and then forget about the whole deal until I was hungry again. Unfortunately I'm not one of those type people and I really don't think I ever will be because every time I've lost weight before, I've almost immediately relapsed. I've gotten to a healthy weight, then I've relapsed almost instantly. It's like a yo yo for sure, I hit that weight low and BOING......go right back up. I want to just see food as fuel and then forget it. I feel like that is probably what normal people do...........but I just can't do it. I OBSESS about food.........all the time. In the past when I've lost weight, I don't think about it all the time. I feel pretty normal about food........get hungry........eat something..........then go on. But that sly little demon starts to sneak back around.........he says "hey, you're a healthy weight..........it doesn't matter that you aren't hungry.......go ahead and eat that piece of birthday cake...it won't hurt anything." And then before I know it I'm over 200 lbs again! It is such a struggle. I know I can do it......I've done it before.........I just long for the day when it is second nature............if that day ever comes!

Thank you Lord Jesus, for making me. You created me...........You love me............You are my strength............if only I will rely on you. I love you.

The full soul loatheth a honeycomb; but to the hungry soul every bitter thing is sweet. Proverbs 27:7

This verse means to me that if my soul is full with the love of Jesus, then food won't even mean anything to me, but if my soul is hungry for Jesus, no matter what I eat will taste sweet, but won't fill the holes in my soul. Not sure if I articulated that well enough but...............

Til next time............I'll be unTHICKIN and soTHINNIN!

Picture of me........

Ok...........this is the first photo............first day of new plan..................please be kind...................it's not pretty!

Are you ready.............................here goes.......................................

This was just before I set out to do my elliptical machine................................(which I did for 20 minutes by the way, yay me!)

Deep breath...............................here we go............................

If you click on the picture you can see it in it's larger form..........if you are that brave! lol

Oh legs like stalwart oaks..........oh hips of padded glory................oh yea lovely flabby arms.............glorious double chin........................

Oh......whoops got carried away with my sonnet to myself there.............

Alright...................I'm ready to do this!

Lord, please give me the strength of character to turn my body into a temple that will be strong and healthy. You have blessed us so richly and we thank You for each and every day that we are alive to spread the message of Your Love and Devotion to us, Your humble children. Please forgive me where I fail You, as I am weak. I love you............

Til next time.........I'll be unTHICKIN and soTHINNIN!

The beginning..........

Ok.......I've decided to convict myself and come clean...........I'm a food addict.............no seriously...........I've got problems! I started gaining weight right after 8th grade. I'm not exactly sure why..........but I wound up a 230 lb high school sophmore. I'm only 5'3" tall and I weighed 230 pounds. Then later in my sophmore year my dad got diagnosed with diabetes. The whole family went on a diabetic diet and I (pretty quickly I might add) got down to 165 pounds! Yaaay me! That's not that a bad weight for me as I'm a farm girl and I pack some muscle. I wore size 12 jeans and boy did I ever think that was exciting. I used to thump on my collar bones because I'd never had them before! LOL! Then I began working in a deli in a grocery store.........yup.........crack-whore in the pharmacy let me tell you! I (again rather quickly) shot up to 175. That is where I met my wonderful beautiful amazing husband Daddy P and we got married two months later. I worked in the deli for about a year after that and when I quit there I think I weighed about 190. Then we moved and I started working at a department store..........much better for a gal like me! I got pregnant with my daughter and after working there for 1 year and 1 month.......had my little girl and of course didn't go back to work. When I delivered The Yougnun I weighed 260 pounds. After her birth I discovered a program that worked pretty well for me at the time and I QUICKLY lost well over 100 pounds getting down to 148 (the thinnest I've ever been in my life......gracious I think I probably weighed 148 pounds in the 6th grade!) However......as is typical with me.........as soon as I hit 148 I began creeping back up........until I hit 260 again only 3 years later!! I stayed that heavy for quite awhile..........until about 3 years ago when I once again got myself together and got down to 175 pounds. Then........crack whore in the pharmacy again..........I got a job as the cook at a high school. Yup you guessed it...........WHAM.......back up to where I am right now............229 pounds as of this morning.

I am a beautiful, passionate, sexy, loving, caring, wonderful woman who also happens to be overweight. I'm strong, intelligent, and FAT! I'm a great cook, a pretty fair housekeeper, a gardener, a fab-u-los-o wife and a pretty cool mom. I want to be HEALTHY. Right now I am.......no high blood pressure, no diabetes, nothing else, but I'm sure it's coming. I know that if I don't get this weight off and KEEP IT OFF, that I'll be just like my dad, my grandpa, my uncle and my aunts, who all have weight problems and all have health problems as a result.

So..........last night I joined Weight Watchers online, and this morning I'm starting this blog. I hope that the blog will help me to be accountable. I tend to hide........and I've got to face this demon head on! That is the only way that I'm going to whip it once and for all. I am a pretty darn together lady in all other aspects of my life. This is my failing..............food. I pray about it alot, but frankly sometimes I feel like God gets sick of my whining! JUST DO IT...........put the food last.........it is only fuel after all, nothing more. But I'm the type of person who really really enjoys food. I like to buy it, prepare it, cook it, and most of all EAT IT! I like to look at recipes, and make new dishes. I've got to get a handle on this.

In this blog I'm going to report to you....my faithful readers (of which there are NONE lmao) every day about how I'm doing. I'm going to be honest, so it might not be pretty every day especially the first few weeks.............months.............ok years! I'm going to report to you my weight, and a photograph, weekly (YIKES........this is really gonna be ugly) because I feel that if I do that then I can't hide. I will be putting it out there for all to see and I'll have to face my food addictions.

Ok so if I ever get any readers, than you in advance........and even if I don't get readers, this will be like my online journal of.............THICKIN AND THINNIN!

God bless you all in your journeys.........whatever they may be!

Soap Making......

Today I've been milling soap. That means I'm taking my basic block of soap (that I prepared a few weeks ago) and grating it, adding fresh goat's milk, and remelting it, thereby making a wonderful creamy, rich soap that makes our skin so very soft and silky! The first batch I added cornmeal and lemongrass essential oil. The cornmeal is a wonderful exfoliant (great for scrubbing garden dirt off of the hands) and the lemon scent is very very lovely! The second batch I'm adding wheat germ for a more gentle exfoliant and added skin softening. I love making soap. It makes me feel very good to use my own creation to get clean! I also don't have to deal with the yucky dryness that so many of us gals have to deal with on our arms and legs. I use my soap for shaving my legs and pits as well (not that you want to know about my hygeine practices) It works great!

The following photos show the steps that I use when milling my soap.

These are the blocks of basic soap......

Photo on top (below text) is me grating the basic soap............Photo on bottom is the grated soap with the milk added. You put it over very low heat and stir occasionally until the soap is nicely melted together. If you stir too much the soap will be full of little bubbles....not a big deal, but not what you want.

After the soap is melted nicely, you add your additives (scents or otherwise) then pour into a mold. I use a plastic shoe box type thingy. Then put the mold in the freezer for a couple hours and then pop the soap out onto butcher paper. Then cut into bars and let dry. That's all there is to it!

(Above) Top photo is the uncut block of milled soap. This batch has the milk, cornmeal, and lemongrass scent. Bottom is the cut bars of soap. These are ready to use now, but waiting until they are fully dry will make them last longer.

Well gotta go finish up supper!

Til next time............GOD BLESS FROM GOODWIFE FARM!

Garden update, hubby's birthday, and a nice day trip!

This is a picture of our rooster Mr. Cackles with two of his hens patrolling the property for bugs, worms, larva, and other yummy chicken delicacies! That's our sweet corn crop in the foreground, it's disappointingly short this year as we have had a LOT of rain and it is also planted in newly broken ground. This fall we'll put lots of good horse, goat, and chicken poop on it and till it under, then next spring I'm going to plant my cool weather crops in that patch because it is in partial shade. It should be a great location for my lettuce, spinach, beets, peas, cabbage, and other cool crops. I'm not going to have enough corn to can this summer, but we will have lots of corn on the cob to eat fresh. Next year I plan to plant twice as much corn and hopefully the weather will cooperate. God knows what He's doing though and I'm not complaining. The rain and cooler temps have been wonderful for my onions, peas, and lettuce crops! I've canned beans three times for a total of about 36 pints. I've got lots more to do of course. Green beans are just about the only green veggie my hub-unit will eat so we have them almost every night! I need LOTS of pints of green beans!

This is a picture that my daughter took of myself and my husband on July 3 (his 36th birthday). We got him two shop lights with bulbs for his shop, and a new tow strap cause he already broke the one that we bought him for Christmas! He was pulling stumps out of the fence row and pop, broke it the first time he used it! lol. After he opened his birthday presents we went catfishing again, but didn't catch anything this time. :( We still had a nice time enjoying the beauty of God's world and being together as a family!














Here a picture of The Youngun and her daddy on his birthday!


















This is a picture of The Youngun with a Bald Eagle at the Bald Eagle exhibit at Dixon Mounds in Lewistown IL. Saturday was rainy, rainy, rainy so since we couldn't do anything outside, we decided to take a day trip to the mounds. We are very interested (as an entire family) in the history of our wonderful world. It's really exciting when you have wonderful historical elements right in your own state! Cahokia Mounds is very close to where we live and we've been there a few times, but had never been to Dixon Mounds.

It was a long drive but well worth the trip. We enjoyed perusing the artifacts from Illinois' prehistory. We love to imagine what our state looked like before power lines, litter, and modern buildings. I think it would have been amazing to have walked our state when it was pristine and unsoiled. That said, there is something for living in our modern times as the average age for a woman in the Mississipian culture was 35.........that leaves me 3 years to go! We finished our day trip with a wonderful supper at a diner in Central Illinois. Then it was on to home to get Tulip milked, eggs gathered and rabbits fed and watered!



Our town's Independence Day celebration was postponed due to rain so we went and watched fireworks on Sunday evening. EJ and I reflected on how so many people call it "4th of July" when it is and should be called Independence Day. That is the day that we celebrate our Independence..........an Independence that is slowly but surely being taken away from us. But that is a whole nother can of worms, isn't it!

Till next time................GOD BLESS FROM GOODWIFE FARM!