Tuesday, July 20, 2010

The Changes God Brings..........

Whew, it's been a long time. I've got so much to share and don't know if I'm up to sharing any of it. It's all been good stuff, well all but the WW's aspect of things.

Our prayer as a family is always to have open hearts ready to go where God leads us and the courage to follow through. For the past 6 months or so I've been out of sorts, wonky, alternately unhappy, weepy, angry and back again. I thought my PMS had just gotten totally out of hand or that I had a humdinger of a hormone imbalance.

Then one day about 2 months ago it hit me..........I didn't want this lifestyle anymore. I didn't care about my goats, my chickens, my livestock anymore. Didn't have the desire to own them, let alone care for them. I fought this, and I fought it hard. This is who I am, this is a major part of what makes me, ME..........right?? I talked to The Man about this and he in his infinite wisdom said, "Wait two weeks (to be sure it wasn't PMS induced) and then if you still feel that way lets sell 'em." I waited two weeks, then a month and the desire hadn't gone away. I just didn't care anymore and didn't want to do it.

In the meantime The Man has been stressed about work and himself feeling like he wants to chuck it all and move to Florida if only we could win the Lotto! This prompted us to begin seriously thinking about moving to Florida. His company has a division in Pensacola and he could probably get transferred. That prompted a discussion about leaving his current job (which he actually really loves) and our families and we decided what if we just downsized and stayed in this basic area? What if we sold our place, bought a nice little house in town that was a whole heck of a lot cheaper and only had our dogs to worry about? We could go to Florida three weeks a year and take weekend trips besides if we didn't have this place tying us down. That sounded like a dream come true, so guess what? I'm out of the homesteading business. I sold all my rabbits, all my chickens, most of my goats. All I have out there now is my old horse Champ and my two older doe goats. The girls will stay until we move and then they'll go to my dear goaty friend Rhonda. Can I tell you how great I feel? Can I tell you it feels as if a weight I didn't even know I was carrying has been lifted off me? I've done some heavy soul searching and I've discovered that I haven't wanted this for quite some time. I was keeping it up because I liked the reaction I'd get when folks found out how we lived. How sad is that? Pathetic really....

Anyway, The Man is thrilled as well because he never wanted this life. He did it out of love for me. I never had any idea how much he didn't want it, until I said I was done, such a good, loving man have I. He never complains EVER and he's never once said to me, no we don't need to do this, or I don't want to do this. He's bent over backwards to make me happy, and now it's my turn to make HIM happy and I'm so excited about that!

So where are we now? Well I've cleaned and tossed and organized and that feels wonderful as well. We've hauled three truck loads of schtuff to the auction (and made over 700 bucks to boot!) a great big load of scrap, and another load of trash. Every piece of carp I give away, sell, or throw away is another weight lifting off. We finished the kitchen (and it looks faboo!) and the realtor is coming tomorrow to put the ole' homestead on the market. We continue to pray for God's direction and guidance and know that He won't steer us wrong. Even if it isn't God's plan for us to sell this place right away, we feel better not having the expense and responsibility of 11 goats, 12 rabbits, and 40 chickens!

I've got some weight and food related stuff to blog about, but I'll save that for another day.

God Bless you all, and may you open your hearts to His direction and have the courage to follow where He leads you, it's sometimes scary, maybe even rough and rocky, but He'll always lead you through!

Till next time.......


  1. Thank you for redirecting me! Congratulations on recognizing what was going on, talking (and praying of course) it through, and then...ACTING! It sounds like a huge weight has been lifted off your shoulders. I wish you great luck and success as you move forward.

  2. Dear Goodwife ~ Thank you for directing me here too. Your post makes me want to cry and also makes me feel happy for all of you. Bless your hearts for being willing to make changes. It's not always easy to do.

    May you feel God's love and peace surrounding you each and every day as you walk this next leg of your journey.


  3. That's awesome. Follow your new direction and see where the Lord leads ya. After our weekend, the husband said he wanted to sell all the cattle. He really didn't mean it though. But I know what you mean about all the stress, time and money associated with the animals. They tie you down. I can't wait to see what lies ahead for y'all.

  4. WOW! But you know its not for everyone and it maybe that later you would want to go back to it on a smaller scale you have the knowledge.
    Personally I am as close to town as I will ever get!LOL Okay we are about 1/4 of a mile from the city limits of a town of less than 700.. Just enough to keep me sane but I have most of my privacy.
    I am glad you figure dit out and did something before you let it get out of hand. Some people dont realize its time to mov eon and hol d on to what they are doing..
    Florida?? My husband was born and raised some therestillhas family.. I told him not for love nor money. But I am to white to enjoy the beaches and I cant stand that much humidity!
    One family member got offended when I said that!Lol
    I hope htings work out for you all and God is always faithful when you give it over to his will!

  5. Thanks all! Wife, I totally understand which is why The Paintiff wanted me to wait a few weeks to make sure it was something I really wanted to do!

    Tonia, we've been consistantly downsizing for years. First we had 38 acres, then 22, now we are down to 5. We've had more animals here though than anywhere. I truly never ever EVER thought I'd feel like this. Not ever. I used to swear up and down that I'd never live in town, and would never ever not have my animals. We've been doing it together for 14 years and I grew up with it. It's funny where God leads us and even funnier how we think we know better than He does. I feel better than I've felt in years because I'm actually truly letting go and accepting that He's got something else in store for me!

  6. Best wishes in your new endeavor -- it is OK to make changes! Am I included as a follower or do I still have to let you know.... I would love to continue watching you follow your dream!

  7. Nope Country Girl, you already knew about this address! ;) I'm just going to exclusively blog here from now on!


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